Trigger/Content warning: discussion of suicide, bullying, and assault
Please read at your own discretion.
Introduction
14-year-old Adriana Kuch was like any other American teenager. Her family described her as a “fun-loving little girl.”
But on February 1, 2023, Adriana was physically assaulted by a group of bullies at her school. The bullies then uploaded the video they took of the assault to social media. The video caused Adriana to experience more hate and cyberbullying.
Less than two days after the attack, Adriana took her own life.
A lawsuit filed by her family said it was “a result of the emotional distress, humiliation, and embarrassment she experienced.”
But unfortunately, Adriana’s story isn’t unique.
Today, 1 out of every 5 students report being bullied, and that number doubles for people with intellectual disabilities.
Bullying is a problem that spans generations, dating back centuries. However, modern tools and evolving online platforms give bullies a bigger platform and a way to hide from the consequences of their own actions.
As educators, parents and leaders, we can’t afford to have the next generation of children be crippled by lessons we should’ve learned. Bullying has no place in a brighter future.
Who this guide is for and what to expect
This resource is for anyone who works with or lives with students and young adults. This is for anyone wanting to take positive action despite a rising tide of hatred in-person and online.
In this piece, we’ll unpack the following:
- Understanding Bullying in the Digital Era
- How Digital Spaces Enable Bullying
- The Real-World Impact of Bullying
- Recognizing the Signs of Bullying: Victims and Perpetrators
- Strategies for Preventing and Reducing Bullying
- Empowering Parents, Teachers, and Leaders to Take Action
- Inspiring Change: Fostering Resilience and Inclusion
Understanding Bullying in the Digital Era
At its core, bullying is characterized by three key elements: intentionality, repetition, and a power imbalance. There are 3 key types of bullying that manifest in different ways:
Direct Bullying
- Name-calling - using language to make someone else feel inferior or like an outsider
- Hazing - putting someone through strenuous, unsafe, or impossible tasks in order to join a group
- Physical violence and intimidation - using physical force (i.e. punching and hitting) to gain power or the threat of physical force to get someone else to feel less powerful
Indirect Bullying
- Rumors - saying false things about another person to cause stress to that person or harm their reputation
- Damaging property - breaking or wearing down someone else’s personal property to leave the bullied person without that resource or sense of comfort
- Exclusion - intentionally leaving someone out and/or encouraging others to leave someone out of conversations and activities
Cyberbullying
- Cyberbullying - threatening or bullying behavior done online, often done anonymously toward another person
Different bullying styles affect children differently. For example, a higher percentage of male than female students report being physically bullied (6% vs. 4%), whereas a higher percentage of female than of male students reported being the subjects of rumors (18% vs. 9%) and being excluded from activities on purpose (7% vs. 4%). (National Center for Educational Statistics, 2019)
Regardless of how it comes to be, bullying is always deliberate.
These actions are repeated over time, making victims like Adriana Kuch feel trapped or helpless in the situation. The power imbalance can take many forms—physical strength, social status, or even access to private information. Whether it occurs in person or online, bullying is always about exerting control over someone perceived as vulnerable.
In the digital age, the face of bullying has evolved, taking on new and sometimes more insidious forms. One of the defining features of modern bullying is the anonymity provided by online platforms, giving rise to "keyboard warriors" who hide behind screens to say things they would never dare to say in person. This anonymity often emboldens individuals to be cruel without fearing immediate consequences, making online spaces particularly treacherous for young people.
Another troubling development is the role of group dynamics in cyberbullying. Online platforms make it easy for group pile-ons or coordinated attacks to occur, where multiple individuals gang up on a single victim. These attacks can quickly spiral out of control, amplifying the harm as comments, posts, or messages spread and gain traction. Victims may feel as though an entire community is turning against them, which can be deeply isolating and damaging.
Finally, the digital age has shifted much of bullying from physical confrontations to psychological attacks. Rather than face-to-face threats or violence, bullying online often takes the form of spreading rumors, exclusion from group chats or social circles, and trolling. This type of bullying targets a person’s emotional well-being, chipping away at their confidence and self-worth over time. The public nature of online platforms often adds another layer of humiliation, as harmful content can be shared widely and remain accessible indefinitely.
In this new landscape, it’s crucial for parents, educators, and community leaders to understand these modern forms of bullying. By recognizing how bullying operates in digital spaces, we can take proactive steps to protect young people and create environments that promote kindness, empathy, and respect—both online and offline.
How Digital Spaces Enable Bullying
The rise of digital spaces has fundamentally changed how bullying occurs, making it more pervasive and, in many cases, harder to escape. Cyberbullying has been shown to affect older children more—data that aligns with older students spending more time online than younger children.
Ofcom, the British Office of Communications, found that 4 in 10 children aged 8 – 17 (39%) have experienced bullying, either on or offline. Among these children, the bullying was more likely to happen on a device (84%) than face-to-face (61%).
Constant Connection
“One of the primary reasons for this is the accessibility and constant connectivity that the internet provides,” said Holly Jacobs, Director of Research and Evaluation, Special Olympics Unified Champion Schools. “Unlike traditional bullying, which often happened during school hours or in specific settings, online bullying can happen anywhere, at any time.”
The 24/7 nature of the internet means victims are no longer safe when they leave school or close their social circles. Platforms including social media, gaming communities, and messaging apps have become common battlegrounds. Research from the Anti-Bullying Alliance found that the most common way for children to be bullied via technology was through text or messaging apps (56%), followed by social media (43%) or online games (30%).
The digital world is inescapable, which makes the effects of cyberbullying even more overwhelming.
Anonymity = Protection for Bullies
Another factor that enables bullying in digital spaces is the anonymity and lack of accountability online. Many platforms make it easy to create fake profiles or post anonymously, allowing bullies to hide their identities while inflicting harm.
While platforms like Facebook have attempted to crack down on fake profiles, the time it takes for them to identify and remove those profiles aren’t fast enough to prevent bullying.
This anonymity emboldens individuals who might not engage in bullying behavior face-to-face, removing the fear of immediate repercussions. Additionally, the difficulty in tracing and punishing online bullies makes it challenging for schools, parents, or even law enforcement to intervene effectively. Victims are often left feeling helpless as their bullies remain hidden behind screens.
Bullying Made Viral
Digital platforms also have the potential to amplify the harm caused by bullying through virality. In the past, bullying might have been limited to a single classroom or social group, but in the digital age, it can spread to an entire school—or even the wider world—with a single post.
Student Carter Lachal faced viral public humiliation after a video of him being forced to lick a bully’s shoe went viral. This sort of public humiliation is exacerbated by likes, shares, and reposts, which allow harmful content to reach a larger audience quickly. What’s worse—many social media channels see comments condemning bullying actions as more reason to spread the content around.
To add to this, online communities sometimes normalize toxic behavior, with victim-blaming attitudes discouraging individuals from coming forward or seeking help.
It’s critical that parents, educators, and community leaders understand the digital side of bullying in order to holistically address it. Whether through stricter platform policies, education on digital ethics, or fostering environments that prioritize empathy, it’s possible to create safer online spaces for young people.
Recognizing the Signs of Bullying: Victims and Perpetrators
Signs a Child Is Being Bullied
“Bullying often leaves emotional, behavioral, and physical traces that parents and educators can notice if they pay close attention,” said Jacobs. “Emotional distress is one of the most common indicators. Children who are being bullied may display irritability, experience frequent mood swings, or cry more often than usual. These shifts in emotional stability can be a sign of the immense stress and fear they feel”
Avoidance behaviors are another major red flag. A child might begin skipping school or finding excuses to stay home, often because they dread encountering the bully. Conversely, some kids may avoid using their phones or computers if bullying is happening online, preferring to withdraw from the digital spaces where they feel unsafe.
Physical symptoms of bullying can also manifest, often tied to the anxiety and stress it causes. Frequent headaches, stomachaches, or trouble sleeping, such as insomnia or nightmares, might point to underlying emotional turmoil. These symptoms are sometimes dismissed as minor ailments, but when paired with changes in behavior, they could signal something deeper.
Signs a Child May Be Bullying Others
While it’s critical to identify children who are being bullied, it’s equally important to recognize signs that a child may be engaging in bullying behavior. Aggressive or manipulative tendencies are key indicators. Children who bully often demonstrate a need to assert dominance over their peers, which can translate into controlling or intimidating behavior.
Secretive use of devices may also hint at problematic online activity. If a child seems to guard their phone or computer use, it’s possible they are sending hurtful messages or participating in harmful online activities. Additionally, dismissing others’ feelings or enjoying conflicts between peers can be an indicator that a child is bullying. Such behaviors often stem from a lack of empathy or a desire for attention.
How to Approach Children to Uncover Bullying
When addressing bullying, it’s crucial to build trust and create a safe space for children to share their experiences. This involves offering reassurance that they won’t face judgment or retaliation for opening up. Ask open-ended, nonjudgmental questions like, “How has school been going lately?” or “Have you ever felt uncomfortable or unsafe with friends or classmates?”
“Avoid accusatory language or making assumptions, as this could cause a child to shut down,” said Jacobs. “Instead, focus on listening, validating their feelings, and expressing unconditional support to encourage honest communication. This compassionate approach can help uncover hidden issues and provide the foundation for meaningful action.”
Strategies for Preventing and Reducing Bullying
Keeping Safe at Home
At home, the foundation for preventing and reducing bullying starts with fostering empathy and teaching digital citizenship. Parents can model respectful behavior and explain the importance of treating others with kindness both online and offline.
Monitoring online activity is important, but it should be done in a way that respects privacy. By setting clear expectations and boundaries while maintaining open communication, parents can ensure their children feel safe reporting any instances of bullying. Encouraging honest conversations about what’s happening online also helps build trust and awareness.
Minimizing Bullying in Schools
It’s essential to implement anti-bullying programs and workshops that educate students about the harmful effects of bullying and teach them how to stand up for others.
Peer mentoring can also be a powerful tool, where older or more experienced students help younger ones navigate social challenges and create safe spaces for those who may be at risk.
“Special Olympics Unified Club and R-word campaign are student-led efforts seeking change in the school,” said Jacobs. “When students in school see their peers doing something or promoting something, they are more likely to accept it or want to do it.”
Research shows that adolescents, especially the older they are, are less likely to turn to adults to deal with social issues.
With so much of today’s learning taking place online, establishing clear policies regarding cyberbullying and ensuring consistent enforcement are key to maintaining a safe learning environment. When students know there are serious consequences for bullying behavior, they are less likely to engage in it.
Staying Safe Online
It all starts with promoting responsible use of technology. Encouraging children to think critically about their online behavior and its impact on others helps instill a sense of accountability.
Adults can also use their voice to advocate for stronger policies and reform online. Cyberbullying is a crime in most US states. However, there are no federal laws addressing cyberbullying. These social media companies are companies that can and should be regulated. However, they won’t implement those changes until they feel pressure from the adults who use their platforms.
Also, engaging kids in discussions about internet ethics and safety can empower them to make better choices online and protect themselves and others from harmful interactions. Be honest with them about the dangers of online bullying and engaging with strangers online.